Understanding and Supporting Peer Conflict
WHAT IS PEER CONFLICT?
Peer conflict refers to mutual disagreement or hostility between peers or peer groups. It is characterized as conflict between people of equal or similar power (friends); it occurs occasionally; it is unplanned; and it does not involve violence or result in serious harm. Perpetrators of peer conflict do not seek power or attention. However, peer conflict can escalate into violence.
WHAT IS THE ROLE OF PEER CONFLICT IN CHILDREN AND ADOLESCENTS DEVELOPMENT?
Peer relations during middle childhood and adolescence are an important part of children’s social and emotional development. Children and adolescents pick up essential social and communication skills from their peers as they move into late adolescence and early adulthood.
Peer conflict is not necessarily a bad thing; disagreement and conflict are a natural part of life, and children and adolescents need to develop skills to resolve disagreements. However, peer conflict can cause significant emotional and physical harm and can lead to aggressive behaviours when children and adolescents lack the social skills necessary to cope with their frustrations.
Therefore, it is important for parents and educators to be able to identify peer conflict and aggressive behaviours, and to promote positive peer conflict resolution techniques for children and adolescents.
Traditionally, many adults have viewed conflicts between children as undesirable and have tried to prevent them or to intervene. Recent theory and research, however, suggest that peer conflict contributes to children's development. Educators are beginning to focus on helping children develop conflict resolution strategies by providing specific social skills that they can put in place instead of resolve conflicts through adult intervention (Ramsey, 1991). Parents too can focus on helping their children develop such skills and strategies.
We must keep in mind that peer conflict contributes to children's development and represents an important form of social interaction. It is through conflicts that children and young people develop the necessary social and emotional skills to face future difficulties in adult life.
HOW THE PRESENCE OF AN ADULT IMPACTS PEER CONFLICT?
The presence of an adult changes the context of children's conflicts. Children take responsibility for their interactions and generate their own solutions more often when an adult is absent (Laursen & Hartup, 1989). Children's conflicts tend to be more aggressive when an adult is present (Killen & Turiel, 1991). When adults provide solutions, they sometimes make mistakes or are inconsistent or biased in the resolutions they impose. Such inconsistency and bias are especially true in parents' dealings with their own children's conflicts.
HOW CAN PARENTS AND EDUCATORS ADDRESS PEER CONFLICT?
Some relevant implications for adults can be drawn from research on peer conflict.
1. Adults need to be aware of children's intentions. Is this conflict one that the children are truly trying to resolve, or is it verbal play? Adults should help children make clear their own understanding of the conflict.
2. Children's ability to resolve conflicts increases as their verbal competence and ability to take other perspectives grow. If the children involved in a dispute are verbal and empathetic, adults should let them try to work things out themselves.
3. Adults' decisions to intervene should be made after they observe the issues of children's conflicts. Possession issues and name-calling generate less discussion than issues about facts or play decisions.
4. Children who explain their actions to each other are likely to create their own solutions. In conflicts characterized by physical strategies and simple verbal oppositions, adults should help children find more words to use.
5. Adults should note whether the children were playing together before the conflict. Prior interaction and friendship motivate children to resolve disputes on their own.
6. Adults can reduce the frustration of constant conflict by making play spaces accessible and providing ample materials for sharing.
7. Children often rely on adults, who are frequently happy to supply a "fair" solution. Adults should give children time to develop their own resolutions and allow them the choice of negotiating, changing the activity, dropping the issue, or creating new rules.
8. Many conflicts do not involve aggression, and children are frequently able to resolve their disputes. Adults should provide appropriate guidance, yet allow children to manage their own conflicts and resolutions.
Sources:
Wheeler, Edyth J.: Peer Conflicts in the Classroom. ERIC Digest. 1994
Kathleen Sidorowicz, B.A. and Elizabeth C. Hair, PhD: ASSESSING PEER CONFLICT AND AGGRESSIVE BEHAVIORS: A GUIDE FOR OUT-OF-SCHOOL TIME PROGRAM PRACTITIONERS. Child Trends, October 2009.
Sinews MTI
Psychology, Psychiatry and Speech Therapy
A Few Tips For a Healthy Holiday Season
As we are fast approaching the end of the year and Holiday Season, this period can often elicit a lot of stress, discomfort and anxiety in many of my clients.
With the many social and family gatherings, the last minute gifts shopping and end of the business year craziness, many people often feel overwhelmed, pressed for time and exhausted..
It is totally understandable and to help you cope with this special time of the year, I’d like to offer you a few simple tips to keep yourself sane and healthy even throughout the Holiday Season.
Here are 5 of my favourite tips for a healthy holiday season:
Slow Down & Cut Back:
The best way to avoid getting overwhelmed and sick at the end of the year is to slow yourself down. If your schedule is too crazy to allow you to slow down; then let this be an indication that your plate is already too full and that it’s time to prioritize and cut down on your projects and to-do’s. You’ll feel instant relief when you realize you don’t have to do it all at once nor right away. Re-evaluate what is most important and focus on that task/project.
Schedule Me-Time:
If you are unable to slow down at work, then at least make sure you carve out dedicated ME-time into your weekly schedule. Taking the time for self-care will allow you to relax and regroup. Not only will you feel rejuvenated but it will also help boost your immunity and bring down your stress levels- both essential for staying healthy and sane.
Ground Yourself With Wholesome Nutrition:
As a holistic nutritionist, teaching my clients how they can use nutrition to feel supported and strong is one of my favourite things to do. Indeed, when you consume wholesome and nutrients-dense foods, you’ll feel more grounded, energized, healthy and happy. It is all connected. Here are a few foods I would highly recommend at this time of the year: grounding root vegetables (squash, pumpkin, sweet potato), seasonal fruits (apples, pears, pomegranates, persimmons), warming and anti-inflammatory spices (ginger, turmeric, cardamom, cumin & cayenne pepper) and immune-boosting leafy greens and cruciferous veggies.
Keep Moving:
I know it can be very tempting to skip exercising and keeping your body moving when it’s cold outside or when we are so busy.. But this is exactly when we need to keep moving. Moving your body regularly will maintain your energy levels up, improve your mood and keep you healthy and strong. Think of it as a fun way to give yourself a break. Choose forms of movements that you truly enjoy doing and that you can look forward to.
Sleep It Off:
This is another important self-care practice that often gets tossed out the window at this time of the year. Yet, sleep is primordial for your health and well-being, especially during the Holiday season! Make it a priority by developing a night time routine that will help you unwind and signal to your brain that it’s time to relax and get ready for some much needed rest & rejuvenation. Note: Avoid screens for at least 45 minutes before bed. This will really help you if you’re having a hard time falling into a deep and restful sleep.
And there you have it, a few simple but very effective ways to stay healthy, strong and sane this Holiday season.
For more tips, or if you would like to figure out exactly how you can implement specific lifestyle and nutritional tips to support your health, feel free to call or write to Sinews.
Sinews MTI
Psychology, Psychiatry and Speech Therapy
The Benefits of Mindfulness
In a world of constant movement and rush, the need for peace and calm is increasing significantly. People are experiencing higher levels of stress and anxiety as their biological response to overcome the demands of their work and life. But the resources they use are burning them out from the inside, so, as a result new tools such as mindfulness are becoming more and more important.
Mindfulness is a special type of meditation that encourages people to experience their present life with a different focus. Basically, it helps individuals to slow down and appreciate the beauty around them. The only thing they need is a personal commitment with their psychological and physical health and a lot of practice.
The only way that people can reach a mindful state is by practicing their disconnection from the noise outside on a daily basis. As we do in SINEWS Multilingual Therapy Institute, you can support and guide your practice through group sessions, but if you want to see how your heart rate decreases or your anxiety goes away, it’s up to you to practice mindfulness every day.
And last but not least, we need to mention that mindfulness means more than just letting your mind go blank. It’s about building consciousness about the present moment, everything that happens both inside and out. It’s a changing experience that helps you improve your wellbeing and long-term life satisfaction.
If we search for the word mindfulness in internet, we might find more than 500,000 different resources that try to help us to understand this concept. Even within those search results we might find plenty of different recommendations to become a mindful person. But, from my professional perspective, there’s only one real way to really discover what mindfulness means: practicing it.
In general terms, we could say that mindfulness is not such as a new trend. During millions of years, Asian cultures have been practicing many types of meditation. These practices have the purpose of helping you to disconnect from the surroundings and to connect with what really matters: the individual. The way in which you disconnect from your surroundings depends on the approach of your chosen practice, but the core of it is the same: taking care of your psychological balance. And because of this core, we, as psychologists, are encouraging our clients more and more to become mindful. Also, this basic core is closely linked to the basic idea that says that mindfulness helps us to train our mind to put the focus on what we really want to be focused. This means that we become capable of shifting our focus according to the situation we are in. A clear example of this is when we are at the office having a very busy day, with a high workload and lots of demands from our boss or coworkers. Being mindful is the ability to disconnect even for five minutes and enjoy that break regardless of the bustling environment.
So, why do we recommend practicing mindfulness? It might seem a bit confusing that clinical psychologists recommend the practice of this “new” trend as a way to improve our clients’ wellbeing when there are many other techniques that have been scientifically proven to help in that aspect. It is because our experience has shown us the multiple benefits of mindfulness, not only with functional clients but also for clients suffering from anxiety or depression. These benefits can be classified in two main types: physical benefits and psychological benefits. Let’s dive into each on these:
Physical benefits of mindfulness.
According to numerous research studies, mindfulness has been proven to:
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Improve our heart rate, reducing the likelihood to have heart diseases.
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Decrease the negative impact of psychological symptoms.
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Balance our autonomous nervous system.
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Increase the amount of grey matter in the brain, which contains our motor and sensory neurons.
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Enhances the balance of our limbic system.
We tend to put a lot of physical pressure on our bodies, in addition to the pressure on our minds: we go rushing everywhere, we don’t pay attention to our body signals, etc. Just by practicing mindfulness for 10 minutes every day, we can benefit from it and we will set our physical health as a priority.
A good example we tend to give our clients is to use their walks to their office as a way to disconnect from the stress of the ride. How? Imagine that you are walking quickly to arrive to the office, your mind is anticipating all the things that might happen during the day. In the moment in which you realize this speed, start walking slowly, putting your focus of attention in how your foot guide you consciously to a new place, enjoying the weather, the beauty of your pathway. You will see how your heart rate decreases significantly and you will get to work with a low base level of activation (stress). That’s being mindful.
Psychological benefits of mindfulness.
We could be talking about the psychological benefits of this practice for hours, and all the clients that have tried mindfulness with support us with their own experiences. In my case, after a few years of daily practice of mindfulness, I would highlight the following three main benefits:
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Mindfulness facilitates building your self-concept based on what you learn about yourself. Every time you disconnect from the outside and focus on your breathing, you’re connecting to your inner self. This way it is easy to maintain an internal dialogue with your feelings and basic sensations, and therefore, discover what you like and what you don’t like. And how does it happen? Keep in mind that mindfulness is not only about the 10 minutes you practice it, it’s about committing to the mindset and life reality with a different perspective.
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Mindfulness connects you to the present moment. Researches tell us that we expend most of our time thinking about past experiences (mostly associated to negative emotions such as regret, guilt or sadness) or trying to anticipate what it’s going to happen in the future (reinforcing an unreasonable amount of need of control and fear to uncertainty). We live our lives without consciousness, without paying attention to what happens. Mindfulness train us to have mind flexibility to know when what we are thinking doesn’t allow us to be in the present situation. And one essential thing: this doesn’t mean we shouldn’t pay attention to negative emotions, actually we really need them. But we need to learn to deal and accept negative emotions but being capable to look for the positive and present ones.
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Mindfulness encourages you to be grateful and appreciate the beauty around you. Because it’s not only about being in the present knowing how you really are, but also to be open to enjoying what happens around you. There’s beauty in everything we do and we experience, but it requires time to really focus on it. Mindfulness helps you to give yourself a break to appreciate the small details that makes the difference. And as your awareness grows, you gratitude too. You will become grateful for feeling alive because you will learn how many things you have missed during your life and how beautiful is life now that you experience it with full attention.
But these are not the only benefits. From my point of view, there are other two benefits worth mentioning: mindfulness boosts your creativity and it facilitates the use of empathy and social skills in difficult contexts. If you want to become a more “think outside of the box” person, give yourself the space to connect with fresh air. Or, if you want to improve your social interaction, cultivate your mindful state to be able to focus on the positive things in social context instead on the elements that trigger your anxiety.
To close this article, I would like to go one step further. Mindfulness is not just a practice or a theory of well-being. Mindfulness is not even just a meditation practice. Mindfulness is a type of mindset. Mindfulness is a way of living. Mindfulness is a way to focus on the present to experience life from a different light. That’s the difficult part of becoming mindful, but if you reach that state of mind, you will discover the beauty of your surroundings and you will be more satisfied without having the active need to reach for happiness. Your mindful mind will do all the work for you.
In SINEWS we actively build a space of peace and growth for individuals who wants to improve their life satisfaction. If you want to join our powerful group sessions, contact info@sinews.es.
Sinews MTI
Psychology, Psychiatry and Speech Therapy
Meet your new School Counsellor!
What does a School Counsellor do?
Hello everyone! My name is Juan Yague and I am the School Counsellor at King’s College in Soto de Viñuelos. I have previously worked in as a School Counsellor and Orientador Educativo in both primary and secondary schools. I have also worked special education teacher and educational evaluator in the United States. I love everything about the world of education and firmly believe in quality education that offers students the possibility of developing into adults whose values are based upon effort and respect.
This school year, I will take on a new role that I’m sure will have a positive impact on the well-being and relationships of all members of the school. The school counsellor is a qualified professional that has obtained the necessary training and practice in listening to people and offering guidance and advice based on the principles of confidentiality and respect. In this manner, the School Counsellor listens without judging the worries and problems of students, parents and teachers trying to offer help and accompaniment in any difficult situation or disorientation.
School Counsellors are trained to help people confront and resolve their problems in situations that we feel we don’t have the tools or ability to resolve ourselves. They also are there to help at the time big or important decisions need to be made, clear up any confusing situations or even to get to know oneself to be able to live in a mindful and satisfactory way. Stress, anxiety, personal and family problems, and relationships with friends are all examples of situations that if we don’t know how to control well, can have a negative impact on our lives. This is why it is important to seek help from a professional that can help identify the problem and find the best solution for it.
On the other hand, the school counsellor also plays a fundamental role in the overall coexistence of the school as a whole, assisting students in maintaining healthy relationships. During adolescence, it is extremely important to be able to count on your group of friends - to have a group that you can share anything with, a group that you are comfortable being around, where you are accepted and supported. The School Counsellor’s job is to watch and observe these types of interactions and relationships in order to ensure a life for students where they feel welcome and integrated.
As for teachers, the School Counsellor can also help them deal with their daily struggles and any difficulties they might have, especially when dealing with various situations and behavioral issues in the classroom.
Finally, the School Counsellor is also available to hear out any families part of the school community.
Many parents need information or orientation of the education of their children, how to manage their behavior, situations at home, or simply to be able to better support students in their academic achievements.
There is evidence associated with having school services of orientation and advising, and how it has created a positive impact in academic results and achievements in general. Having a larger amount of this type of assistance has also been proven to lead to higher satisfaction rates in students and also parents, teachers, and other personnel. Because of this, I invite you all to come by my office with any question or concern you might have. I will be waiting, ready to assist.
School Counsellor
SINEWS at King’s College
Sinews MTI
Psychology, Psychiatry and Speech Therapy
Amor con ojeras
El nacimiento del primer hijo lleva consigo una auténtica revolución en la vida de los padres: es un momento especial, en el cual dos personas de repente se encuentran responsables de una criatura totalmente dependiente de ellos y cuyas prioridades irán por delante de las suyas, modificando completamente buena parte de las costumbres que tenían hasta entonces. Ése es el punto de partida de “Amor con Ojeras”, un divertido libro ilustrado.
Su enfoque, bastante pragmático, es muy claro: con un bebé el tiempo para cuidar la vida de pareja se reduce muchísimo y por eso hay que saberlo aprovechar bien. Por ejemplo en el libro se muestra que con tan sólo tres horas a la semana (divididas en pequeños momentos) puede haber un salto de calidad: consejos sencillos (desde enviarse mensajes cariñosos por WhatsApp hasta escuchar lo que ha hecho el otro durante su día, decir lo positivo e incluso encontrar un par de horas para una “cita de novios”, en la cual hay que esforzarse en no hablar de lo que ocupa y preocupa a los padres primerizos,es decir el bebé).
Muchos de los consejos que se dan en este libro están relacionados con la gestión de las expectativas. Si ya en general uno de los mayores enemigos para el buen funcionamiento de cualquier relación de pareja puede ser la gestión de las expectativas, ésto se amplifica enormemente en el posparto, que para muchos padres viene cargado de muchísimas expectativas formadas durante el embarazo que es muy difícil que se lleguen a cumplir.
En el posparto y los meses posteriores además, hay que tomar en cuenta un elemento muy importante, que caracteriza muchas viñetas del libro y con las que se identificará más fácilmente cualquier padre primerizo: el cansancio, fiel compañero de viaje durante muchos meses (o años) para casi cualquier padre y madre.
El cansancio dificulta aún más la vida de pareja si no se sabe gestionar con empatía y sentido común, dejando al lado expectativas demasiado altas. Entendiendo que cuando estáis cansada/o a más no poder simplemente no podéis ser siempre amables, alegres y contentos: es importante no tomárselo de forma personal, recurrir al reproche.
Además es relevante, según indica autora del libro conseguir cada día, a pesar del cansancio, unos momentos de intimidad y cariño, gracias al cual la vida de pareja, con especial énfasis en la vida sexual, no sólo aguanta sin que incluso puede quedar beneficiada del gran cambio que ha tomado.
Sin duda el cambio, tanto físico como psicológicos que la maternidad y la paternidad provoca en el deseo y en la práctica sexual es otro de los temas más importantes de este libro, y el tono de sus viñetas, una mezcla entre humor explícito, ironía y ternura, cumplen una función muy importante, la de visibilizar un tema que afecta a todos pero del que se habla muy poco o nada en público.
Como psicóloga y terapeuta de pareja, al igual que la autora del libro, Mamen Jímenez, recomiendo este libro por qué mientras que existen miles y miles de publicaciones enfocadas a ayudar a los nuevos padres a enfrentarse con éxito al hasta entonces desconocido mundo de los bebés y de la crianza, muy poco se habla y aún menos se escribe sobre los cambios en la relación de pareja tras el nacimiento de un hijo.
En “Amor con ojeras” se dan consejos para que las parejas salgan reforzadas de la aventura que es convertirse en padres y se hace a través de grandes dosis de humor, divertidas ilustraciones, mostrando tantas situaciones en las cuales todos los padres primerizos se sentirán identificados pero sobre todo ofreciéndoles herramientas para que puedan aprender a cuidar la relación de pareja tras los incontables cambios que conlleva el nacimiento de un hijo.
- Tapa dura: 156 páginas
- Editor: Lunwerg Editores
- Idioma: Español
- ISBN-10: 8416489688
Sinews MTI
Psychology, Psychiatry and Speech Therapy
Study Coaching en Sinews
Is the academic year already starting to take a toll on you or your child? Studies can often be overwhelming for myriad reasons. Our study coach and Educational Psychologist Juan explains how adding sessions with a study coach into your life can be a wonderful way to not only keep up with the demands of academic life but to thrive!
What’s Study Coaching?
Study Coaching is a working partnership that focuses on the process of learning. Together with a professional coach, any student can examine their learning styles, habits of working, and current difficulties or barriers to success.
The Study Coach and student will work as a team to create and put in place more effective strategies and set up personal goals in academic and learning areas.
The aim of Study Coaching is to heighten awareness of what it takes to achieve academic success and anchor this with new strategies.
How can the Study Coach help students?
The Study Coach will help students find out what is preventing them from being successful in academics. This process involves one-on-one sessions along with small group workshops tailored to specific needs. The Study Coach works along with the student throughout a process of discovering their strengths and areas in need of improvement. Then, the Study Coach provides guidance to create a personalized academic success plan.
Another important component of Study Coaching is helping students understand how their use of time and levels of organization or disorganization impact their studies and academic achievement. In the coaching process, it can also be important to train the student in some study skills such as reading comprehension, developing a successful writing process, taking and reviewing notes, preparing for tests and exams, managing the test taking process, etc.
Who can benefit from Study Coaching?
Any student at any grade level can benefit from Study Coaching. From students at highest levels of Primary Education, when it is necessary to start building up basic study habits and organizational skills, to College Students that may feel in need of guidance to improve their performance as students or just learn further strategies to reach optimal levels of motivation and higher academic achievement. Sometimes, a lack of tools and strategies results in high levels of anxiety and distress. Then is when Study Coaching helps the student to prioritize and better organize in order to be efficient and fully benefit from time spent on studying.
How can Study Coaching help Students with Disabilities?
Given the nature of many disabilities, learning can be uneven over time.
Whether a person experiences visual impairments, hearing loss, ADHD, learning disabilities, chronic or temporary health conditions, or mental health conditions, there are times when students are less able to be fully present to learn certain strategies and skills or take reasoning and problem solving to higher levels. These moments of less optimal learning can create what later appear as gaps in learning or functioning.
Study Coaching can help students with learning disabilities to acquire basic study skills and to become more independent and functional so they can overcome difficulties and barriers inherent to any condition.
Can I benefit from this service?
Of course! All you need to do to contract our services is get in touch! You can speak with us via telephone 917001979 or sending an email to info@sinews.es.
Sinews MTI
Psychology, Psychiatry and Speech Therapy
We like stories: Lost and Found
We like stories: Lost and Found We continue the Sinews Blog section dedicated to commentating children’s stories with our second reading,
Lost and Found
In this marvelous tale, Oliver Jeffers tells us the story of a boy who finds a penguin at the front door of his house. The penguin seems sad and the boy interprets this as him being lost.
Our boy decides to help him and starts an arduous search for the penguins origins ; he goes to the Lost and Found office, asks the birds, even his duck… however he does not find answers.
Finally the boy finds out that penguins are from the South Pole! He prepares a rowboat with all the things he and the penguin need and rows for days and nights in a long journey to bring the penguin home. On this trip, the boy tells stories to the penguin who proves to be an avid listener.
When they arrive to the South Pole, the boy is happy but the penguin seems sadder all the time. They say goodbye and when the boy rows home, he realizes that the penguin was not lost at all, but that he had felt alone and that is what made him feel sad. Therefor he decides to go back and look for him to offer his friendship.
In this precious story with beautiful and detailed illustrations, the author speaks to us fundamentally about friendship, the necessity of feeling accompanied by others and about loneliness. The boy assumes that the penguin has gotten lost but in reality he feels lonely which is why he looks for the company of the boy and follows him everywhere. In the time that they spend together on the boat, the penguin pays attention to the stories told by the boy, enjoying his company, his friendship and his care. It is in the final goodbye when he feels the most sad.
In this story we find not only moments of “lost” and “found,” but also that in reality there are many important moments: the initial meeting of the two, the beginning of their friendship, the search for the penguin’s origins and all of the moments they spend together, the final goodbye and the reunion that will forge their friendship.
In Lost and Found, the importance of each other’s company is evident- as much as to not feel lonely as to rid oneself of solitude. Friendship, the care that it implies and feeling accompanied by others are fundamental for maintaining our emotional well-being. Although we all need interaction with others, the interpersonal relationships in the case of children are fundamental for the development of sense of self. They learn important values such as loyalty, fidelity, healthy competition, love, and friendship- fundamental for their emotional development and as social subjects.
A deeper reading of this story can also lead us to think about the different occasions on which we offer others multiple solutions to their problems when what they truly need is to feel accompanied, that we are on their side and can count on our support.
Finally, I would like to touch on the beauty of the illustrations. While they may seem simple at first glance, they are full of colors and intense contrasts that, together with the text, transport us to the South Pole listening to the sound of the waves.
I hope that you and your children enjoy this marvelous story about friendship!
- Number of pages: 32
- Editorial: Harper Collins
- Language: English
- ISBN: 9788494347665
- Apt for: 3-7 years
Sinews MTI
Psychology, Psychiatry and Speech Therapy
Stottern - Fragen und Antworten rund um das Thema
Gibt es jemanden in ihrer Familie oder Freundeskreis der stottert, oder sind Sie sogar selbst betroffen und möchten etwas mehr zum Thema erfahren?
Definition
Etwas sagen wollen es aber nicht fließend aussprechen können.
Beim Stottern ist der Redefluss unterbrochen und diese Unterbrechung äußert sich in Blockaden, Wiederholungen oder Dehnungen.
- Als Wiederholung von Lauten, Silben oder Wörtern (z.B.: w-w-w-warum?)
- Als lautloses Pressen von Anfangsbuchstaben (z.B.: Ich heiße B——-ernd.)
- Als Langziehen einzelner Laute (z.B.: Laaaaass mich doch iiiiiiin Ruhe.)
Die betroffene Person weiß genau was sie sagen möchte, kann es aber nicht ohne Sprechstörungen herausbringen.
Stottern ist ein absolut individuelles Phänomen, das zu einer körperlich bedingten Sprechbehinderung zählt und kann je nach Gefühlslage und Verfassung des betroffenen Menschen schwanken.
Diese Sprechbehinderung kann gemeinsam mit anderen Auffälligkeiten auftreten, den sogenannten Begleitsymptomen, wie auffällige Verkrampfungen der Gesichtsmuskulatur, zusätzliche Körperbewegungen beim Sprechen, sowie vermehrtes Schwitzen oder eine veränderte Atmung.
Häufig werden auch Ängste vor Sprechsituationen entwickelt.
Auf das eigene Stottern reagieren Betroffene oft mit einem Vermeidungsverhalten oder der Taktik des Verschleierns. Beim Erstgenannten wird das Sprechen an sich weitgehend gemieden, was bis zu einem totalen gesellschaftlichen Rückzug führen kann. Beim Verschleiern werden zum Beispiel Füllwörter genutzt, um das Stottern zu umgehen. Oftmals werden während des Sprechens auch blitzschnell „schwierige“ Wörter gegen andere Begriffe getauscht, damit der Gesprächspartner das Stottern nicht bemerkt.
Was ist die Ursache des Stotterns?
Die genauen Ursachen von Stottern sind bisher noch nicht ausreichend erforscht.
Man geht davon aus das die meisten stotternden Menschen vermutlich eine Veranlagung zum Stottern haben, zu dem dann auslösende und aufrechterhaltende Faktoren dazukommen. Stottern entsteht in einer Zeit, in der sich das Kind körperlich, geistig, emotional und sprachlich am schnellsten entwickelt. Bei der Entstehung spielen daher, Einflüsse aus der körperlichen, psychischen, sprachlichen und sozialen Ebene eine Rolle.
In der weiteren Entwicklung des Stotterns wächst die Anstrengung beim Sprechen und das Kind versucht, Stottern zu vermeiden. Es können negative Gefühle und Einstellungen gegenüber dem Sprechen entstehen. Teufelskreise aus Angst und Vermeidung sowie aus Anstrengung und Frustration erhalten dann das Stottern aufrecht oder verstärken es noch. Das Stottern automatisiert sich zunehmend und kann umso schwerer wieder verändert werden, je länger es andauert.
In welchem Alter beginnt Stottern und wie viele Menschen sind betroffen?
Das Stottern beginnt meist im Alter zwischen zwei und fünf Jahren, kann jedoch auch noch später auftreten. Normalerweise hat das Kind zuvor bereits eine Zeit lang flüssig gesprochen.
Im Verhältnis stottern etwa doppelt so viele Jungen wie Mädchen. Mädchen verlieren das Stottern häufiger wieder, wodurch das Verhältnis auf 5:1 anwächst. Generell tritt Stottern in allen Kulturen auf. Es gibt 4.000 Jahre alte Schriftstücke, die von stotternden Menschen zeugen.
Bei Erwachsenen schätzt man, dass ca. ein Prozent der Bevölkerung stottert.
Beruht Stottern auf psychischen Problemen?
Nein. Stotternde Kinder und ihre Eltern unterscheiden sich in ihrer Persönlichkeit und ihrem Umgang miteinander nicht von den übrigen Familien.
Stotternde Menschen haben keine typische Persönlichkeit oder Charakter der dieses ausmacht.
Sie sind nicht nervöser, ängstlicher oder gehemmter als normal sprechende, nur weil sie stottern und sind auch nicht weniger intelligent. Diese Art der Vorurteile sind in der Bevölkerung leider immer noch sehr verbreitet. Stottern ist eine Störung des Sprechablaufs. Allerdings können sich die Gefühlslage eines Menschen und das Stottern in hohem Maße gegenseitig beeinflussen.
Kann Stottern vererbt werden?
Bislang konnte die Frage warum manche Menschen stottern und andere wiederum nicht, nicht genau beantwortet werden. US Forscher sind der Auflösung allerdings vor kurzem etwas nähergekommen. Die neue Entdeckung stützt die Theorie, das Stottern erblich bedingt ist und dass es somit einen genetischen Auslöser gibt. Die Forscher fanden durch Genom – Analysen 3 Gene die dabei eine Rolle spielen.
Können Eltern das Stottern ihres Kindes verursacht haben?
Man geht nicht davon aus. Stottern entsteht aus dem Zusammenspiel dreier Einflussbereiche: Einer Veranlagung zum Stottern, einem Auslöser, der das Stottern auftreten lassen kann, und aufrechterhaltenden Bedingungen, die dafür sorgen, dass das Stottern bestehen bleibt und sich weiterentwickelt.
Es geht viel mehr also um die diversen Faktoren die die Entstehung des Stotterns beeinflussen als um eine genaue Verursachung dessen.
Wie die neusten Forschungen zeigen, spielt eine genetische Veranlagung eine entscheidende Rolle. Die Studie zeigt das es biologische Ursachen hat und wir somit den Eltern das Schuldgefühl nehmen.
Welche Auswirkungen hat Stottern auf das Leben der stotternden Menschen?
Leider entwickeln Kinder schon im frühen Alter, bedingt durch die Reaktionen ihrer Umgebung ein Störungsbewusstsein, das sie häufig stärker belastet als das eigentliche Stottern. Die meisten stotternden Menschen vermeiden Wörter oder Situationen, bei denen sie fürchten, stottern zu müssen. Alltägliche Situationen, wie der Kauf einer Fahrkarte, können daher ein großes Problem darstellen. Freunde und Freizeitaktivitäten werden somit nicht nach den tatsächlichen Wünschen ausgewählt, sondern danach, wenig sprechen zu müssen. Negative Reaktionen der Mitmenschen wie Hohn, Ablehnung, Mitleid und Verlegenheit können den sozialen Rückzug fördern. In Schule, Ausbildung, Beruf und in den Medien werden stotternde Menschen immer noch diskriminiert.
Wie sollte man als Zuhörer auf Stottern reagieren?
Logischerweise ist es am Besten, wenn man sich einfach ganz normal Verhält, Blickkontakt halten, ausreden lassen und keine Wörter vorzeitig ergänzen. Das wirkt demütigend. Verkneifen Sie sich gutes Zureden wie «nur ruhig» oder «hol tief Luft». Das hilft nicht. Ein gelassenes Zuhören kann die Situation aber entspannen. Man muss dazu nur etwas mehr Zeit aufbringen.
Was tun, wenn das Stottern in der Schule zum Problem wird?
Die Schulzeit kann sehr belastend sein. Abgesehen von der sozialen Ausgrenzung der Mitschüler und dem Hänseln, werden stotternde Schüler benachteiligt, wenn ihre Sprechbehinderung nicht ausreichend bei der Benotung mündlicher Leistungen berücksichtigt wird.
Lehrer wissen in der Regel nicht, dass Stottern eine Behinderung im rechtlichen Sinne ist. Die schulrechtlichen Regelungen sehen für Schüler mit Behinderungen einen Nachteilsausgleich vor. Dieser sollte auch im Fall Stottern eingefordert werden und kann darin bestehen, dass stotternde Schüler mehr Zeit in Prüfungen erhalten oder Alternativen zu mündlichen Leistungen angeboten bekommen.
Wie erfolgreich sind Stottertherapien und welche Behandlungsmöglichkeiten gibt es?
Die meisten Kinder verlieren das Stottern bis zur Pubertät wieder vollkommen. Bei welche Kindern und mit welcher Behandlungsmethode lässt sich jedoch nicht vorhersagen.
Fachleute sind sich allerdings einig, dass die Therapie umso aussichtsreicher ist, je früher eine qualifizierte Behandlung erfolgt.
Bei Erwachsenen kann die Sprechflüssigkeit sehr verbessert und ihr Stottern so kontrollieren werden, dass sie gut kommunizieren können. Für die meisten ist dies aber ein lebenslanger Prozess, der kontinuierliche Arbeit erfordert und bei dem mit Rückfällen gerechnet werden muss.
Es existieren zahlreiche, zum Teil recht unterschiedliche Therapieansätze. So kann mit Hilfe von Sprechtechniken ein flüssigeres Sprechen erreicht werden. Dieses Ziel verfolgt ein anderer Ansatz dadurch, dass Stottersymptome nicht vermieden, sondern verändert werden. Ein qualifizierter Therapeut zeichnet sich dadurch aus, dass er verschiedene Konzepte individuell kombinieren kann und auch Gefühle und Einstellungen des Patienten zum Stottern berücksichtigt.
Ziel der Therapie ist es vor allem:
- Dem Stotternden die Angst zu nehmen.
- Das flüssige Sprechen einzuüben.
- Zu lehren, wie der Stotternde weniger anstrengende Sprechweisen in den Alltag übernehmen kann.
- Ein Gefühl für den Sprech- und Atemrhythmus zu vermitteln.
Eine spezielle Methode der Therapie bei Erwachsenen ist das Fluency Shaping das auf eine Veränderung der Sprechweise abzielt und verhindern soll, dass das Stottern überhaupt auftaucht. Techniken sind beispielsweise der weiche Stimmeinsatz am Anfang des Wortes und das Dehnen von Vokalen. Außerdem lernen die Betroffenen, ihre Atmung zu kontrollieren
Bei Kindern unterscheidet man in der Therapie einen direkten und einen indirekten Ansatz. Der indirekte Therapie Ansatz konzentriert sich nicht auf das Problem an sich, sondern darum, Ängste abzubauen und die Lust am Sprechen zu fördern. Der direkte Therapie Ansatz hingegen, setzt dich unmittelbar mit dem Stottern auseinander um gezielt Blockaden entspannen zu können.
Gibt es Medikamente die gegen Stottern helfen?
Die „Pille gegen Stottern“ gibt es nicht. Es gibt Medikamente die das Stottern zwar vermindern, solange diese eingenommen werden, nach dem Absetzen kehrt das Stottern jedoch meist unvermindert wieder. So scheinen Medikamente, die zu einer Entspannung der Muskeln führen, zu wirken, während angstreduzierende Medikamente keine Wirkung zeigen. Wie bei allen Medikamenten, insbesondere bei längerer Einnahme, muss mit schädlichen Nebenwirkungen gerechnet werden. Daher empfehlen wir von Medikamenten abzulassen und einen professionellen Sprachtherapeuten aufzusuchen.
Was tun, wenn das Stottern in der Schule zum Problem wird?
Vor allem die Reaktionen der Mitmenschen lösen bei stotternden Menschen große Angst aus. Wenn sie sich jedoch entspannt fühlen, fließt meist auch die Sprache vergleichsweise unproblematisch. Es hilft, wenn Sie Ihrem stotternden Gegenüber ein wenig die Anspannung nehmen. Dabei helfen folgende Tipps:
- Nehmen Sie ihn als Gesprächspartner ernst.
- Hören Sie ihm ruhig und geduldig zu.
- Lassen Sie ihn ausreden.
- Unterbrechen Sie einen stotternden Menschen nicht und sprechen Sie nicht aus Ungeduld für ihn weiter.
- Signalisieren Sie Aufmerksamkeit, indem Sie Blickkontakt halten.
- Auch gut gemeinter Zuspruch wie „ganz ruhig“ oder „immer langsam“ verunsichern den Stotterer zusätzlich.
- Vor allem: Machen Sie sich niemals über einen stotternden Menschen lustig.
Sinews MTI
Psychology, Psychiatry and Speech Therapy
Understanding Dyslexia
Understanding Dyslexia
During the school years, plenty of children struggle with reading. Most of them catch up after a few months, as a result of the getting the extra help that they need, others even improve without any intervention at all. However, for some kids, a different kind of help over a longer period of time, will be needed. Which is one of the main red flags to indicate whether there is a reading problem or a specific language disorder as dyslexia.
Dyslexia is a brain-based issue that makes children have enduring and unexpected difficulty with reading, spelling and consequently, writing. To further understand what dyslexia is, it is necessary to describe its most common characteristics:
To begin with, dyslexia is a life-long condition, as kids do not outgrow dyslexia, but with the right support, their skills can improve. It has nothing to do with intelligencebecause in fact, studies have shown that there is a discrepancy between the children’s abilities and what they are achieving. We can clearly see that kids with dyslexia often struggle with reading despite having the intelligence to be much better readers.
On the other hand, dyslexia is not a problem of vision or laziness, but with understanding and working with language. Reading and spelling are hard for kids with dyslexia because first, they will have to recognize those individual sounds and then they will have to understand that each of those sounds is represented by one or more letters, often causing fatigue and frustration. Children with dyslexia usually have difficulty with this basic language skill called phonemic awareness, so you may see your child having trouble with rhyming or isolating the sounds in words that make it difficult for your child to match letters to their sounds. This skill is called decoding and children use it to sound out words.
Lastly, dyslexia is also a common learning issue and it should not prevent your child from achieving her goals or her dreams. Many successful people have it and they use their own strategies and routines that help them achieve high standards. Besides, researchers have been studying dyslexia for over a century, so there is plenty of information on what measures to take, as well as what would be more convenient for your child, because dyslexia occurs on a continuum, which means that, even if two family members have dyslexia, the severity might vary, hence, what they need to improve, as one of them might have mild dyslexia while the other could have a profound case of it.
So, what are common signs to look for in dyslexia?
A young child with dyslexia may:
- Start to speak late (no actual speech until after age 2)
- Say muddled-up words (aminal for animal or gabrage for garbage)
- Have trouble learning simple rhymes
- Have a hard time following directions
- Have difficulty with short words; repeat or leave out words like and, the, but
- Have trouble differentiating left from right
In school, kids with dyslexia are likely to:
- Have significant difficulty learning to read, including trouble sounding out new words and counting the number of syllables in words
- Write words with letters in the wrong places, like saw instead of was and vawe instead of wave (called transposing letters).
- Struggle with taking notes and copying down words from the board.
- Add or leave out small words when reading (which can totally change the meaning of the text).
- Lack fluency in reading, continuing to read slowly when other kids are speeding ahead and show signs of fatigue.
- Have trouble correctly spelling even familiar words; they will often spell them phonetically (cmpt instead of camped).
Outside of school, kids with dyslexia can:
- Have trouble understanding logos and signs
- Have difficulty learning the rules to games
- Struggle to remember multi-step directions
- Have trouble reading clocks and telling time
- Have a particularly hard time learning a new language
- Have emotional outbursts as a result of frustration
What should parents do?
If you notice that your child is not getting the hang of reading, and you are worried about it, chances are that these fears are well-founded. So, it is better to get professional advice than to waste precious months wondering if your concerns are valid, because if it turns out that your child has dyslexia, or any other learning difficulty, the sooner you get a diagnosis the better.
To determine if it is a specific reading ability deficit, an evaluation must be carried out. Therefore, other possible causes for the deficit must be ruled out, such as hearing problems, social, cognitive or environmental factors. Since dyslexia is mostly about how children read, usually kids must wait until they are school-aged (or have had significant early reading instruction) to get an accurate assessment. So, if the kid starts school and struggles with the alphabet, speech sounds, and text, then it is time to quickly have him assessed so you can quickly start the intervention that can help him most.
The tests that your child can undergo (depending on his age) include the following:
- Language tests
- Vision and hearing tests
- Early screening tests
- IQ tests
- Performance tests
- A full test battery
The evaluation will measure your child’s intellectual capacity and reading skills, to determine if there is an achievement gap.
What can help:
The most important thing is to get specialized reading instruction for your kid, as it helps children to learn to break words down into their component sounds, match the sounds to letters and then blend those sounds together. Which is where they struggle the most.
Reading programs based on this approach use multisensory techniques: as tracing letters in sand while say that letter and its sound or clap out syllables in words. These methods are proven to be effective for kids with dyslexia.
Other tips for parents include: using audiobooks, reading apps or help your child by reading out loud together every day. Choosing books that tap into your child’s passion can also help develop an interest in reading. Playing rhyming games, reading nursery rhymes and singing songs can also be a fun way to help him build early reading skills.
Finally, it is important to highlight that even though children do not outgrow dyslexia, they can become skilled readers and strong learners, thus, with the right support, they can succeed in school and in life.
Division of Speech Therapy
Speech Therapist
Children, adolescents and adults
Languages: English and Spanish
Third Culture Kids
My friend Alice came back to Madrid for a visit the other day. She was telling me about how hard it had been for her to adjust to living and working in the UK (where her parents are from, where she was born, but where she hasn’t lived since she was 2 years old). After a nice walk through Retiro Park, she realized her wallet was missing. We went to the nearest police station to report it and I stood there listening to her describe the contents of the wallet: bank card from the UK, bus-pass from Madrid, metro card from Paris (where her parents now live), Illinois driver’s license, San Diego library card… The police officer taking down her statement finally blurted out “Wow!, You are a real globe-trotter!”, and Alice answered, “Nah… I’m just a third culture kid”.
SO, WHAT IS A THIRD CULTURE KID?
Nowadays, because of globalization, the term is becoming more and more familiar. Still, there are some people unaware of this whole “cultural group” that is living undetected (for the most part) in practically every country around the World.
Third culture kid (also known as TCK, third culture individual, invisible immigrant...) is a term that tries to group together people who grew up, or spent an important part of their formative years, in a country other than where their parents are from (1). Some include in this group the people that grew up with parents from different cultures; kids that grew up moving from country to country, never quite settling anywhere; or those that studied abroad while growing up. So, among others, we are talking about expats, missionary kids, children of diplomats or traveling professionals, etc.
Their first culture is the parents’ culture or the one they have made the base of the family house-hold life. The second culture is the one they grew up in (or that of the host country), and the third culture is the one resulting from living and managing the other two, a cultural identity stemming from being both and neither of the others. It’s not just having been exposed to multiple cultures, it’s creating a mixture of the two (and adding a little extra).
Of course, no two TCKs are the same, because they will not have lived the same life-events or shared the same background, but they can definitely identify with other TCKs (2) and develop a feeling of comradery, a shared identity and understanding. An American teenager that grew up in China may have more in common and feel more connected to a French diplomat´s teenager that grew up in Cameroon, than to other teenage Americans or Chinese.
WHAT’S GREAT ABOUT THIRD CULTURE KIDS?
Here are just a few of the amazing strengths most TCKs share:
- Cultural intelligence: By the time they graduate from high-school, TCKs have had the opportunity to interact with many other cultures (friends, school-mates, neighbors, etc.) developing a capacity to do so with ease, understanding where they are coming from, developing cultural sensitivity and a broader world view. They are respectful of differences, being able to put themselves in other people’s shoes and developing the capacity to bridge cultures. It´s no wonder that many of TCKs’ best friends are all either other TCKs themselves or from multicultural backgrounds, and this plays out throughout their lives. Take my brothers, for example: one is married to a Chinese woman he met in the US and the other is about to marry a Chinese TCK who grew up in Japan.
- Flexibility: Because most TCKs are exposed to big changes (moves, new schools, new friends…), they are able to adjust more quickly and develop a resilience that makes them stronger when facing other life changes and difficult moments.
- Wealth of knowledge: As a general rule, TCKs have travelled more than most kids of their age and they have been exposed to a minimum of two different cultural experiences with their own particular cultural wealth (literature, history, customs, folklore, etc.)
- Language skills: Many TCKs are bilingual (some are even fluent in 3 or 4 languages!) and all are exposed to a variety of phonetic and tonal systems which establishes the groundwork for learning other languages.
- Employability: Because of all the strengths mentioned, TCKs are good candidates for many jobs out there. They usually leave recruiting teams quite impressed with their world knowledge and maturity.
WHAT CAN TCKs STRUGGLE WITH?
As mentioned before, not all TCKs are the same, but many find they struggle with some of the following:
- No real “home”: Most TCKs have a real hard time defining where “home” is. Not just because it could be a number of places, but because some have never felt at home anywhere they’ve lived. Some consider it’s wherever their parents and siblings are (even when they go off to college and their parents’ move to a country they’ve never visited before).
- Identity: I definitely struggled with this one growing up (and I was lucky to be one of five children!). What am I? American? Spanish? I don’t feel 100% either… What happens when US plays Spain for the gold in the Olympics? Who has my allegiance? Where do I belong? Sometimes, when it’s time for TCKs to move back to the parents’ passport culture, the one they’ve grown up hearing they are really from, they often find themselves not really fitting in, feeling like outsiders though looking like everyone else. This is where the term “hidden immigrant” applies. Many end up finding their identity in people, and not in places or nationality.
- Rootlessness : This refers to the fact that, because of how they’ve grown up, they find it difficult to stay in only one place and often find themselves needing a change and “moving on”.
- Lack of emotional investment: After years of losing friends and other relationships, or being left behind, they find themselves wary of making new meaningful relationships. What’s the point if I am going to be moving away in two years?
DO OR WILL ALL THIRD CULTURE KIDS NEED THERAPY?
No, of course not. But just like any collective, some may be having a harder time of it, needing help at one point or another, and can benefit from working with a therapist familiar with TCKs and their common struggles. Along with identity and stress management, a lot of the work I do as a clinician with this community is in reference to unresolved grief.
Many have to move every couple of years and are forced to experience so many losses! Not just friends, family, etc., but cultural aspects they’ve grown to identify with and won’t have available in their new “home”.
Also, parents don’t feel the same way and don’t understand the grief or don’t identify it as such. Sometimes, there is just no time to grieve with all the changes (packing up, traveling, unpacking, new school, making new friends…).
WHAT CAN PARENTS DO TO HELP WITH THE TRANSITIONS?
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Talk to your kids about the concept of being third culture. Many will feel a sense of relief at knowing there are people all over the world that have gone through similar experiences and feel just like they do.
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Allow time before every move to emotionally prepare for the change. Talk about the things you are going to miss and the feelings it all brings up. Help your children say good-bye and to gather up all the contact information of friends and family you are leaving behind so they can stay in touch. Involve your children in the process of choosing the new home or the new school (show them pictures, take a virtual walk with Google Earth…).
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Allow time after the move to grieve. Many times, parents respond quite naturally to a big change focusing on the positive and encouraging their children to see the pros, thinking it will make it easier for them. Encouraging is good, but you must also remember to validate the pain and the losses. Those grieving feelings need to be acknowledged and voiced.
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Help them stay connected to the parts of their identity they’ve integrated from their last “home”as they are a big part of who they are now. Continue with typical traditions from the country or cultural aspects you had incorporated (some festivities, traditional meals, décor, scents…) Encourage your children to stay in touch with the friends they’ve left behind (organize Skype calls, fix care-packages…)
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Connect with other multicultural families or TCKs. Making new friends in the host country is great, but it will also benefit your children to make connections with those they can relate to on a deeper level.
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Keep an eye on their progress.Nobody knows your children as well as you do. Be mindful of how the change is affecting them, knowing that stress and sadness are common in transitions. Open communication is important and if you think they are struggling, know there are always professionals out there that can help them process and adjust, as well as guide you on the best way to help them at home.
Sinews MTI
Psychology, Psychiatry and Speech Therapy